Progress

I'm only supposed to track our progress with the Sleep Solution every 10 days, otherwise I'll make myself crazy. BUT, I wanted to share the progress we've made, because it's pretty significant! Last night, Jack slept in his own bed until almost 5 am! And he only woke up once around 1 for about 15 minutes. Can I just say - WOO HOO!! Of course, I woke up every hour to check on him, but that will pass. And I'm sure we will have setbacks, I don't expect him to just suddenly start sleeping all night long, but it's nice to know that he can do it, and that what we are doing is working.

Here's to sleeping!!

The No-Cry Sleep Solution

Jack does not sleep very well at night. He used to, but not anymore. He wakes up an average of 6 times during the night, and can't go back to sleep without my intervention. Needless to say, I'm tired. Most people will tell you to let them cry it out, that it's the only way to teach them how to sleep on their own. But I'm just not wired that way. If it works for you and your family - by all means, more power to you. The Cry-It-Out Method just doesn't work for our family. With that in mind I bought a book called The No-Cry Sleep Solution, by Elizabeth Pantley. So far, I'm loving it. It's a big proponent of attachment parenting, which is something we try to practice in our home. It gives many gentle, easy to implement ideas to teach your baby to sleep through the night, and it's full of plain old common sense. So, I am going to attempt "the Pantley Plan". It's not a quick fix, it can take several weeks to see progress, but according to everyone who's attempted this, if you keep at it and have some patience, you WILL see progress. Without hours and hours of crying.

The first step is to complete a Sleep Log, which I did the other night. It helps to see exactly what your child's sleep pattern is, so you can track your progress. Here's how ours looked:

Number of Awakenings: 6
Amount of Awake Time: 1 hour 40 minutes
Amount of Sleep Time: 9 hours
Longest Sleep Span: 2 hours 15 minutes

Now you see why I'm tired all the time??

Now that I can see exactly what I'm working with, we have moved onto Step 2, which is to regulate nap times, which is a big contributer to better night-time sleep. The better they nap, the better they sleep at night. I already knew this, but it can be difficult to ensure they always get good naps. So we are currently working on getting in 2 good naps a day - one around 9:30 and one around 2:30. Pantley says to do anything that works to get your child to nap - the goal is for them to sleep. You can adjust the routine and the method later, once they are sleeping better and have set their little body clocks. Makes sense to me. I got Jack to sleep today at 10:00 (which is better than his normal nap time of 11:00 - and then he only takes one nap a day), so we are seeing a little progress already.

I've taken several of her ideas, the ones I think will work best for our family and sleeping arrangement, and started to implement them. One is the use of key words to signal that it's sleepy time. It takes a week or two for it to start to have an effect she says, but if you keep at it, eventally they will start associating your key words with sleep, and then you can use those words to help calm them down and get them back to sleep. I've also started the Gentle Removal Plan, to help Jack fall asleep without eating, as he does now. This involves slowly taking away the bottle or breast as he falls asleep, the time getting shorter and shorter each time. If he cries, give it back, and just keep trying until he accepts the change, which according to Pantley, he eventually will. Again, it takes time, but I'd rather have it take longer and use a gentle and loving approach than just let him scream it out.

I'm supposed to implement these ideas, and then do it for 10 days. At the end of the 10 days, I will do another sleep log, to track progress. Then you re-evaluate your approach, decide if you feel it's working and change as necessary. Then another 10 days, and so on. After a few weeks, we should see some better, longer sleep! The trick is for me to be patient, and not give up on him!

Wish us luck!!

The Trouble With Kids

The trouble with children is that they are entirely too smart. Especially small children. Don't let toddlers fool you - behind that cute exterior where they can't tie their shoes or say "elephant" correctly they are hiding a wickedly smart brain. And I do mean wicked.

I believe that children are born with an abundance of smarts, and then during the teenage years they get progressively dumber until adulthood sets in. It's our job as parents to limit the amount of brain cells that fall prey to stupid teenage idiocy, and just hope that we saved enough of them when they go off to college that they won't end up back at home with us after 4 years of "higher learning". This is why toddlers are so smart. Their brains are still jam-packed with all that extra IQ.

For instance, how is it possible that a 3 year-old child who still can't put his pants on the right way can get up in the morning, turn on the TV, pop in a DVD and push play, all by himself? He can't remember how old he is, yet he's memorized the dialogue verbatim to his favorite movie. He can't figure out the physics of a straw, but he sure as heck knows how much TP the toilet can handle in one flush.

And that's just scratching the surface. They are little sponges, soaking up the world around them at an amazing rate. And we as parents (having experienced the teenage years and lost a significant part of our intelligence), come up with the fabulous idea to teach our children to speak. They have no concept of "the right thing to say", and whatever they are thinking just comes out of their mouth. I'll never forget one time I asked my 3 year-old son Aiden what he'd like to drink with his lunch. He answered me, "Ummm...I'll have a beer." What?

Or how about the time I took Aiden to Walmart to pick up a few things. On my list was a box of envelopes, so we make our way to the office supply aisle. I decide on the least expensive ones they have, and hand the box to Aiden to hold.

"These ones?" he says.

"Yeah," I reply, "Mommy's cheap."

We get to the checkout and he hands the clerk his box of envelopes.

"Oh!" she says, "Are these your envelopes?"

He gives her a sweet smile and says, "Yeah, Mommy's cheap."

But the biggest indicator of their intelligence is the fact that they learn manipulation at such a young age. Even my 9 month old son Jack, when caught doing something he's not supposed to do, gives me the world's brightest, sunniest smile in hopes of distracting me from what's going on. Hello! I'm not stupid! Just because you happen to be totally adorable right now does NOT mean that I'm going to let you pour the bag of flour all over the kitchen floor....

He also knows how to get his big brother in trouble, not that Aiden needs much help in that department. If Aiden is in his face or won't leave him alone, Jack will just start crying at the drop of a hat, knowing that either Mommy or Daddy will come in and say, "Aiden! What did you do to your brother?" Aiden, to his credit, also knows how to manipulate. He's figured out that if he pushes Jack over or takes a toy and makes him cry, all he has to do when we enter the room is cover it up by leaning over and giving Jack a big hug and saying, "Sorry Jack! It's okay! Aiden's sorry!!" He thinks I'm not onto him, but I am...I am....

But God, in His wisdom, has helped parents compensate for these super-smart beings He has put in our care. During pregnancy, Mommies develop an invisible pair of eyes on the back of the head, as well as supersonic hearing. We also develop a "Bullsh*t detector". It works wonders on kids AND daddies.

Time to draw this to a close...I can hear my youngest in his crib, attempting to escape....